Dating and all its Perks....

Today was a difficult one for me. I hate dating so I don't date. I hate the awkward meetings and the trying-to-get-to-know yous its all crap. And in the time we live in people don;t really want to get to know the other person we all have motives and we all think about ourselves first. So I gave up dating but recently my friend said I should just get out there....TEST THE WATERS.Ha so much for that idea. I did what she said and to be honest I felt like a dog in heat and all the guys were after me. This has never happened usually when you wanna date there is no one around but when you don't want to date everyone is lined up at your front door. Don't get me wrong I hope to get married one day and have kids I just didn't think now is the time. I am in Grad school and working... Really a relationship???? So I met this really nice guy and he was cool and we hit it off right off the at but some how he in one week he became crazy wanting to see me all the time and calling me....I hate clingy people I love to just spend time w/ myself and chill. So I have been avoiding him...I know its rude but I hate having to tell someone I don't want to talk to you anymore. So he has been calling, and texting finally I just told him I am not ready for anything I got too much on my heart and head to deal with love and it is my fault for thinking I could date. He seemed pretty upset and then tries to change my mind and I hate that so much... Please when someone tries to break up let them go its not cute to beg, So the moral of my story is dating and breaking up sucks... Especially when your the one breaking up with people I feel terrible... Maybe next time I will just listen t myself....

funny facts about women

I was at the gym and I was about to workout and I walked passed this sign that said spandex is a privilege not a choice. I thought that was funny, so I decided to to write about all of the funny facts that I do or I have heard about.

1.If we don't spend the night, don't give up on calling us back. We were probably just wearing Spanx.( Lol, this is funny because we all try to look good and wear spanx and we are ashamed of it.)
2.When we are truly angry, we go silent. That is your opportunity to apologize, or run. Neither will save you.(It's tough to be a girl sometimes.)
3. Turning down the radio when we are looking for an address(I do this all of the time.)
4.The first naked man women see is ‘Ken( This is an awkward image)
5.Women can't keep secrets. They eat away at them from the inside. And they don't view it as being untrustworthy, providing they only tell two or three people.( Very true we always have to tell at least one person.)
6.women keep three different shampoos and two different conditioners in the shower.( I think I have more)
7.On average, a woman kisses about 79 men before getting married( EWWW, Thats alot of dudes)
8.Gossip. Gossip about everything that walks( We do, its a bad thing)
9.Hold grudges( I hate this about girls we never let go of anything.)
10.always disclosure to much when we are on a date.( Thats why a lot of us are still single.)

Cool Kids

You remember the Kids in your high school that were so cool. they had everything going for them. Remember those kids? I do. I had so many kids in my school that were so cool and everyone wanted to be them I can't say I wasn't cool but I can say I was very shy and I didn't talk to anyone. I just played ball and went home. I never went to a party or got drunk. I guess it wasn't my style. Anywho, I find it funny that all of the people that were so cool in high school are not doing anything with themselves. I use to think they had it so good and all my hard work was for nothing but I realized that It was ok for me not to be the cool kids who did everything. I saw SO of the cool kids that went to my high school yesterday and they weren't soo much anymore... I guess life has a funny way of turning out

Cardinal Rules

cardinal rules for dating in this generation,
everyday I hear girls all the time say why doesn't he call or should I call him?
how long do I wait to have sex or should I just date him? Is he a good guy and so on.
I believe that if we could follow some rules to dating so many more women could have better luck. It just seems like girls are walking around in the dark trying to find the light switch that doesn't exist. Back when I was like 19 I use to love to go out and be the center of it all. I mean when I say I had a roll of Dex of numbers I mean that. I would go out and get like 9 or 10 number in a night... I guess I was that smooth or guys back then were easier.lol, But my cousin is on this I wanna date a bit and not get serious...However, everytime she dates she falls for the guy...EVERY GUY... ALL OF THEM ARE LOSERS F'ING LOSERS. so she asks me how I do it.. you know not catch feelings for every guy I see I told her I made up some rules that I follow and it works for me...DISCLAIMER... they might not work for you but make some that do work for you... Anywho I shared my cardinal rules with her.
1.)never ever ever beg(it's not cute)
2. NEVER SETTLE(if it's not #1 why do it?)
2.HAVE A TOP 3 THINGS YOU EXPECT FROM SOMEONE. It saves you time, and you weed out the losers
3.Don't talk to every guy that wants to talk to you(some are not worth you time)
4.No cupcaking after 9 pm(no flirting)it sends the sex signals
5.set boundaries for yourself.(Its ok to say no and wait)
6.Don't hang out late it gives the wrong impression(sexual feelings happens after a certain time in the hour)
7. the 2 S's two things can happen after dark Sex or sleep.. Most of the time it is sex then come to STD. So stay away from that...But if you can't please please stay protected so many guys do not strap up...Gross!!!!
8. know his background...(Why date a guy who you don't know... Makes no sense)
9. watch for the red flags(Like texting all time, not knowing where he lives, all the pet names...)
10. never talk to someone who has a bunch of girls(your bound to get hurt...you won't change him...)
11. Never play second fiddle( a guy who already has a girl in mind will play with other girls till he is ready don't be that girl...)
12. If he texts while he is with you leave him alone(means there are more girls..shady...)
13. Never date a guy without a job or a career..(Ladies step it up don't settle for a bum..)
14. Never lie about YOUR own situation(Honesty is the key)
15. watch for the words "I'm just real busy" means I'm not trying to get to know you but I do want to hump you...
16. when someone says yall are grown and lets see what happens... Means I want to sex and that's that.
17. No sex till you're serious. It won't kill you!!!!
18. never ask about past relationships.. Unless it is necessary
19. A guy who calls you baby and not your name does about you he doesn't know your name.
20.)Never date a guy who just got out of a relationship... means he could still have feelings for her
21. If you don't have kids don't date a man who does. you can't understand his struggles.
22.)Never let a man determine how you feel about yourself.
23.) Be yourself...
24.)stand by your word... A man won't respect a woman if she doesn't respect herself.
25.Be about your.. Love you first and then love will come... Stop chasing all these guys...

Window of Opportunity

This is how it starts there is a really cute Pharmacist at Walgreen's. I didn't know till I went there he stop me dead in my tracks and I thought; "hmmmm, I haven't seen a pretty dude in awhile!!!" So he asked how i was doing, and I like to think I'm super cool, and I was like oh, yeah I'm good. Any who, so I went to tell my friends that there is a cute guy so they all went to check it out. He is a solid 8.5 that's pretty high. That's looks alone. sidenote, never bring your friends to see a cute dude they always do something embarrassing. My friend stalked him to see what kind of car he drove and found out that he had a car seat in the back of his car I said he has a girlfriend or married...Leave him alone....Any who I had to go back there a week later he remembered my name and was helping me pick out some cough drops(I was getting sick)and my friend was with me, she said he was really flirting and I disagreed I think he was just helping me. He did say something that I could take as flirting. I said if this stuff doesn't work I'll be back, he said that's fine I;ll be here.... HMMMMM, I thought I need to walk away because I feel like he is TAKEN.!!!! So over the weekend I caught the flu my friend was going into Walgreen's for something I can't remember... So she texts me and says DR.Mchotti(that's what I called him) is here.. I thought oh no, she is going to do something so dumb. he asked how I was doing and she told him pretty bad, and he was asking her all these personal questions about me... She told him if I was better I would of brought him cookies. He said" I wish she would of" So my friend thought great your single... so she asks him if he has a girlfriend... DO YOU KNOW WHAT HE SAID????? YUP, I was right he does.
So this long story leads me to my conclusion... do you think it is true that when women say they are taken they lock that door behind them and never look back while men shut the door, but leave a crack in the window?
In this story it seemed like it... 1st in foremost you cant accept cookies from a young hot girl, Not cool. Nor tell her I'll be here. Who knows if he cheats but if he does he is no longer DR. Mchotti, He is Dr. Sir Cheats-alot....

Boys... Men one day I hope.....

Have you ever gotten to a stage where you no longer want to deal with young and simple dudes? Well,  ladies, I have. I am to a point where I am so tired of dealing with the same dudes non-stop. I have made a list and I have been trying to stick with it.... Well, I have been avoiding all dudes in general. I think I just need a break. Well, I put myself in isolation and decided that I was no longer dealing with stupid dudes. I believe that we should pick who we are. You can't be a nickel looking for dime it just doesn't work. I think that so far I have most of my stuff together so I don't see why I can't get a good guy.
The guys that always choose me are always the same ones. No JOKE!!!! They are the ones that drive a cadi, good teeth, have 5 kids, no real job and say:" red bone, red bone, Dang you thick. Can I call you baby girl." REALLY? does that even work on girls... If this does you need to upgrade you taste. I think that this is totally disrespectful. So I wondered why I was always getting guys like this what was it about me that attracted these duds. And really I don't have the answer maybe it is me or how I look I don't know.
So for a while, No one was hitting on me so that as great but then here we go again. I was out with my girls and this dude comes up to me and was like "yo, mami! you look so yummy your my type foreal." I thought to myself again!!!! I just don't get it. I asked my friends do I need to change something about myself... So I hope one day I will meet someone who doesn't yell from their car, or call me thunder thickness, or say I am yummy. We are not 12.... Until then I am stuck being harassed by boys...

Finding yourself

Today I was at lunch with a friend of mine. She is a sweet girl, I met her in one of my Social Work classes and we remained friends. We were talking about women and how we all have flaws that we wish we could change. Some of us have it deeper than others. Since she was little she has been over weight and finally she got surgery and became a very small size, you would think that would fix that would of fixed that whole problem but it didnt. She became obbessed about her weight till the point she wouldn't eat. In her mind every time she looked in the mirror she saw the chubby girl in the mirror. I understood where she was coming from because I believe that we all have things that we would like to change about ouselves but sometimes it doesnt affect us from being social or just living life. My hear went out to her because in my heart she was a beautiful girl.
I am having the smae problem with my cousin she is on this HGC diet and she beleives that if she looses all this weight that all the boys will want her and she will turn into this beautiful woman that gets all the guys. She tells me that I would never understand where she is coming from because I have always had it all. Funny thing though what I learned was you never know what someone is going through or what they feel about themselves. I know what people see about me may not be what I see in myself I beleive we are all human and struggle with things that are internal. I know that a diet, loosing weight, changing your hair color, new clothes can't change what is lurking inside of you.SO.... To everyone that is lost and confused and feels alone there is someone out here that knows how it feels. I write because it is the only way I can express who I am. people think I am the highlight of everything but yet somehow I feel like Im dying inside. I realzie no matter how many things you change materaly it won't change the way you think about yourself, we need to learn to love all of our flaws and try to beat the battles that are holding us down so we can be a better person for ourselves... And help others who have the same problem.